When I cross the threshold of American Shoe, I swear to Sperry that clouds part and sweet baby angels sing. I’m first greeted by a pair of lace-up wedges in the window display that scream “edgy, yet practical.” A little further in sits a table full of boss lady pumps, all begging to go home with me. Who am I to deny my 5’4” frame a little confidence courtesy of 3” heels? I may even squeak with glee as I admire my foot’s reflection while trying on a couple (read: a dozen) pairs of assorted colors and styles.
Waxing poetic over my metatarsal mecca might paint me as a shoe addict. That’s a fair assessment. Shoes are art for me, an extension of my creativity and personality. If I’m feeling sassy, I reach for something with a stiletto or pop of color. But much like an art collection, I’m quite picky when it comes to shoe selection. Factors like color, heel, cushion, purpose, and brand go into the process when I’m looking to add to my collection. One simply does not buy shoes based on size alone. Which leads me to bring up something that’s been bothering me. You’ve likely heard the expression “If the shoe fits…”
While I give the impression that every size 6 in the store is in my crosshairs, it is quite the opposite. I may lose some friends here, but you’ll never catch me in Chaco. There’s nothing wrong with them and the quality and comfort are probably the same as shoes I own. If I were to try them on in my size, chances are they’d fit. Doesn’t mean I’m going to wear them.
Now take this same scenario, but apply it to generational age. If your age fits you into a 15-year range, do you share the generation stereotypes with everyone else who falls in that range? There are several variations of generation range, but here is a common breakdown.
If my age fits me into the millennial category, does that mean that I share all the generational traits with 72 million others ranging in age between 23 and 38? I’m offended to be compared to my own 23-year-old self (it’s a minor miracle I have a clean record), much less someone who has had different experiences with different people at a different time in a different place.
I’m not denying that there are fundamental parallels within an age range. One can argue that stereotyping is human nature. It’s also lazy. We react to these generational observations by fitting millions of individuals into a tidy (shoe) box. Projecting stereotypes can be especially damaging in today’s four-generation workforce. Talk about a minefield of miscommunication. Consider this fictional scenario:
A dozen employees are sitting around the board room table waiting for a meeting to start. I’m checking my emails on my phone when I overhear a coworker who is in his early 60’s comment, “You damn kids always have their noses in their phones. They’ve got it so easy. When I was your age, we had to work for everything.”
Reaction: I think to myself, I hope the geezer doesn’t break a hip when he falls off his high horse.
Response: Rather than reply with snark (which is my default reaction) or ignore him (which would most likely add fuel to his inflamed arthritis –oops, some snark slipped out), I put my phone away, make eye contact with him and begin a conversation about a project he’s working on.
Turns out he’s run into a major obstacle that may result in his project folding. Before coming to this meeting, he received an email letting him know that the project’s grant funding fell through. Dude has had a bad day. Now I can see that his comment is a result of his frustration, not his age.
My profession involves communicating with a wide variety of ages. I have moments of frustration where I react with a generation stereotype. You don’t have to fax everything like you did 20 years ago, Boomer. It’s called email. But for every reaction, there is a response. While it’s difficult to control knee-jerk reactions, we control the message we project. What happens when we trade judgment for empathy? What happens when we stop saying “if the shoe fits” and replace it with “put yourself in their shoes”? While you try that thought on for size (but make sure to consider the other factors, of course), I’ll be shoe shopping. Mama needs a new pair of boots.
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